Lip Service or True Belief

This is my lived experience of my human design crossed with a Kundalini chant and the following is my embodied results.

Day Twenty-Three

I am learning through this practice that you cannot unsee what you see or escape what you are learning. There is no place to hide, and the only way forward is to continue and to make changes that accommodate what you are learning. Today I am facing the fact that I need to follow through on what I promise myself too and I need to be careful of what the promise is.

It is raining today; the world feels fresher and hope blooms for the possibilities. It is time to start my practice.

Chant

Today’s approach felt different and slower with a prayer offered before I started. A prayer beyond the opening salutation and inviting a deeper commune with the intention of the seed sounds.

As life slows for me, I begin.

I watch the birds from my window and an inner quiet descends on me as I contemplate them and what they must think of life. A bird does not question who or what it is, it is completely alive in the moment, and I think I could learn from them.

The chanting feels like a tuning fork has been struck and I am being tuned into the vibration. It feels like I am activating and renewing my soul blueprint of life.

Reflection

Today’s reflection had me think about the difference between lip service or true belief. This had me re-evaluate how I performed this devotion and why. Was I doing this so I could cross one more thing off my list that would not work for me? Was this practice just to be a tick in the box done and move on? I had to stop to think where I fell on the spectrum of this. Am I a believer or just paying lip service to a devotional practice? Also is this how I live life?

I practiced with more care today which made me feel like this chant was settling deeper within me. So, today I am a believer even if it might have been something else before. Today it felt good to begin with a prayer, to quieten myself and to just be present with what I was doing, not looking beyond this for an insight or looking towards what I should do next. It was an acceptance of where I am; I am showing devotion and re-tuning myself to who I am meant to be. I did not need it to be more.

I am taken back to my earlier observation of the Magpie who had caught my attention at the start of my practice. The magpie had my attention because the night before I found it terrified, trapped in the hens’ yard even though the gate was open. It was stuck bouncing from one wire wall to the other not seeing that the gate was open and frightened that I was getting closer. Our hens house has wire above enclosing it completely and keeping its normal occupants safe from the fox that comes calling during the night. The magpie was flying into one wire wall after another as I came up from behind to push him gently towards the opening of the gate. I was just working up my courage to hold him when he saw his chance for freedom and took it. All this made me think about where in life am I frightened and feel stuck not seeing that I have the skills to overcome these issues and move on? It is not something I could readily see and for this reason I am that magpie terrified and stuck flying into one fence after another.

Card

To find the answer to the feeling of being trapped and stuck I asked my cards for some insight. I asked, “What is the nature of my cage that keeps me trapped?”

My answers fall from the deck and today I have two cards. The first is the Butterfly and the second is the Hawk.

Intuitively I feel the Butterfly speaks of the nature of my invisible cage and the second card the Hawk is the gate through which I can escape.

“The Butterfly — Undergoing great change and transformation.”

To me personally I have felt locked within a cocoon of transformational soup for a long, long time. It is like my metaphorical wings cannot break through. I am feeling I am trapped within this period of transformation with no way out. No matter how many things I do and what I try.

Hawk added to what I was seeing about my self-imposed prison.

“Hawk — watchful, all-seeing messenger of divinity”

It tells me that clear seeing is the way out and that I am being divinely led so maybe watch for signs. It is something I am fated to go through (in other words living my human design). The Hawk sees the greater picture as well as details and is asking me to look at this problem with new eyes with a new perspective. This will show me where the gate is so I can finally hatch from the cocoon of transformation.

As I close out day 23, I am filled with hope that the more I feed my soul with spiritual practices, like this devotion, I will find that I have less appetite for the things that do not serve who I am.

See you tomorrow for day 24.