Writing to the Void

The Silence Before the Answer

I often feel like I write to the void. This feels safe — I call and silence is my answer.

If I listen closely, maybe there is a distant echo of self.

Writing becomes safe when it’s not read. I can tell myself I tried. But the end result is the same: I feel like I failed.

Now I must look to my motives. Who do I write for?

Does it matter if anyone finds my work? The answer is no. I am writing, and that matters. I am answering an ache in my heart that says, follow.

When I seek validation, my writing suffers. I disempower myself. I forget to write from the heart. I am begging strangers to give me something only I can do for myself. I see the pattern in my life is asking me to trust myself.

When I ask what I write for… I need to pay attention to the answer. Is it to fill time so I don’t have to move forward? Or is it exploration?

Truth is, I do not get to decide my impact. I get to share. Period. Full stop.

Lately, I have become lost. Overwhelmed. Frozen. Overthinking. Performative. I have come to a standstill. I have stopped writing.

The truth is, I write for myself. It helps me name the shape and pattern of my life. It helps define my edges and brings colour into my world. I want to live. I want to do this well.

I process life through writing. In writing, I slow down enough to see what is arising. To find an understanding of what life is and what it asks. In writing, I find the pattern and path of myself and of life.

In writing, I have learned this: what you seek is shaped by what you are willing to ask. Before an answer can change your life, the question must become clear.

This led me to a deeper question: “What is a question?”

Next: What is a Question?
Pattern & Path — on what we seek in life